vampire sucks

i've grown accustomed to not being out during weekends.. altho, i thought that i should join wave 3 for dinner or videoke, i woked up tad late and was feeling dizzy and ill to the stomach that saturday and ended up staying at home.. sunday, however i picked up some energy to go to church, a teacher at cab asked for my number and says she'll text me about joining a small group.. i'm a bit apprehensive about small group since i am normally tempted to say i am too tired or too sleepy or too something to show up at dana's house on saturday nights for my own small group.. so i'm not sure whether i'd add myself as a member of another- one that i have no friends or acquaintances to start with.. anyway, i've always liked the other church's pastor, he speaks well, altho he reads from a projector, he keeps me awake during the service, this will give me enough reason to choose the church and join worship on sundays.. however, the a.m. schedule is a bone to pick on.. anyway, if i wanted to show up for church i have to make sure that i have cab money at least cuz i don't do tithes.. i was compelled to give something last week, a meager, pitiful amount because i know that i hafta cuz it's payday and i was happy to be there, singing, thinking, resolving things by myself, and simply muttering to God that i wish He'd forgive me for distasteful choices over summer.. lol.. all in all, i will try to stay away from all-nighters on saturday and be more content with being a quiet church goer with no particular goal of attracting attention altho, so many of other tp churchgoers would notice me there-alone- happy as i am to be all by my lonesome,yes- and i wish to keep it that way, save next sunday cuz nazel and i will be seeing that movie about fireproofing a marriage.. :) - God's been gooey great.. i have no material blessing, no specific prayer, not huuuuge requests as of late.. i'm just tired and scared of the new account and responsibility it brings.. i hope i get thru it, unfazed.. - then i have bella and edward the whole weekend.. had i read twilight in 2005, i would've thought it was a great book, not even, maybe the greatest book.. then now that i thought i'm older, i just thought that i am happy to be wasting my weekend away with characters who suck blood, and werewolves, and imagining the cold of the olympic peninsula.. i'm happy at the mere mention of tacoma.. i guess i have a good 8&1/2 years to visit again.. maybe i will.. one day.. 3am shift.. argh..