as good as it gets

i lost a few good hours of sleep today because my new manager texted that i'd be assigned to the sucat site next week.. hello.. i want to be an eskimo, not a construction worker.. it will be great to have another us101 class and then go back to training when i go home however, this whole making me ngarag with learning the new account specifics and having to go to sucat by mass commute- all these i can't do.. what do i know, sucat might have a totally different mayor, senator, even president- ganyan sha kalayo.. - when i hear myself speak tagalog, my spine tingles or i have these "shudder" instances.. haha.. i'm so good at it na! whilst learning the product, i'm still pretty jackfruit.. God bless me.. anyway, i had an anxiety attack because of the reassignment to Sucat, i found God's reassurance in Isiah, from which verse, i forget. it somehow went like, i am the Lord your God who will hold your right hand, do not worry, i will help you.. it's beautiful.. i burst into tears after.. each time i think about how i try to wring out my heart of bad things kaso i'm still left with a bad heart, i remember that God loves me despite that.. so it's still great.. hehe.. - i've no weekend plans.. or i have but, am not sure whether i might go out.. i kinda wanted this last weekend in manila to myself.. eat, walk, stroll, see, feel.. alone.. anyway, there. i ate dinner at 7 eleven alone.. hotdogs.. ;p and i've been doodling when i am bored.. ;p - the difference with people here and from bacolod is that, people here are mostly self made and don't look at you as outsider or you won't feel like an outsider just because you did not come from or grow up in that city, you don't hang out with friends with these last names or with a particular crowd who goes to this particular church and went to this particular school who knows these people who had old money but in reality their homes are on mortgages.. at times pretentiousness in bacolod abounds.. parang people look up to you when you're filthy rich because of your folks and not because you made money for yourself and you can earn your keep at such a young age.. sometimes, feeling ko their values are kinda mixed up in the wrong places.. like stirring your martini when you wanted it shaken.. ganun yun.. ;p kaya nga my soshal climbing skills get better by the day, here, with an eclectic mix of people, you wouldn't feel like you have to get inside a bubble.. - anyway, i made friends.. haha.. pretty girls na naman as useless.. ;p