no! ahhhh i mean yes..

i resolved not to check facebook in the next something something. not check it in an eon because it's yofaks.. and puro mayordoma faces ang nakikita ko.. although, the twindom's public conversations most times make my day.. hay.. the past few days my tummy had been churning like crazy.. i wish i hadn't been too honest and did not blurt out how i was feeling today.. so unlikely of being a girl.. i feel like pounding myself with the hardcover i'm currently reading.. lately, puro compromise nalang ako.. and masking how much i think it's gonna be okay in the end feeling ko it won't be okay.. i will wind up hurting myself or maybe someone else too.. haaaaaaaaaay.. lacked sleep.. smsd mark david for about an hour tas i had to catch up with dich in gaisano cuz we needed pambahay shorts/ PJs.. and we ended up having another sisters' date at greenwich, food took so long we were both irked.. i did something really immature i wouldn't do it again.. dich gave me a problem. sally also gave me the same problem some months ago. this thing about kai shaos(introduction, matchmaking, watevs..) makes me uneasy.. i have to be very polite and should answer texts or phone calls or invites to go out and i cannot tell them people that i damn well don't want to go out.. i sometimes don't return texts/calls and wish them away..and it's not like i am not seeing someone the past 4 months cuz i am and it's kinda odd how i'd have to say i am doing well, i am at work, i thank them for wishing me well, etceteras.. it's annoying.. if i wanted attention, i wanted attention from mark not anyone else.. haaaaaaaaaaaay.. i'll kai shao trisha and juan though.. problem is juan and i are not friends/ weren't introduced.. paano? aiwan.. - i love my guy friends.. whilst cookie and i were smoking ourselves to cancer johnny asked me to go with him for breakfast.. we're as dated as tp bacolod start up days and he along with others like jeremy(etceteras) earned my respect as years go by.. tactless, strict, at times harrassed, regardless of what or who he is during a certain time, he knows that i am a friend.. so i cannot say no when he asks me to listen to him/ go with him and smoke.. or he smokes, i listen to what he says.. he is smart and insightful and he talks about God like jeremy does and makes me happy that certain people still talk about their God.. makes me want to share my God as well.. it was great today.. another practice to my listening skills.. cuz champ and eds joined in.. and when boys talk, gals had to listen, and ako lang ang girl, so i'd shut up and listen.. unlike when you're in a girls' circle, you chatter as galpals chatter.. anyway, i heart johnny and jeremy.. altho not all the time.. hehe.. - i am having difficulty saying no lately.. i guess i don't want to refuse someone or refuse myself as well.. it all boils down to me not being a real good influence.. sana i were upright and really had a stand over something.. kaso, when my knees turn to jelly, wala na ako.. so i say no! then i actually meant yesssss.. haaaaaaaaaay.. i miss you mark.. grrrrrrrrrr.. kenji's still sweet and wonderful.. this boy makes my heart melt even if he consumes half my box of mint chocolate and yelps when he sees me carrying a glass of peach iced tea.. "The one you love and the one who loves you are never, ever the same person." -Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters I still believe that peace and plenty and happiness can be worked out some way. I am a fool. -Jailbird, Kurt Vonnegut Jr. photos are: my family in bacolod.. dich and keken..

patricia and i last week.. agreeing that we wear dresses.. hehe..